I want to go to India

Sometimes I have a love/hate relationship with the industry I am in.... In fact it's not my industry its more or less my feeling towards life's ideals. Let me explain my desire to go to India and maybe that will help clarify the feelings within my heart.

I see this beautiful world around me. Full of gorgeous people, amazing opportunity, love, and happiness. I also see a terrible world around me. Full of individuals without a home, poverty, sickness, and despair. At times, I want to give up everything. My status as an editor, model, my belongings, etc. Although, being an editor and model help bring awareness to many social causes I believe in, which is why I continue my work. However, I still have an urge to do more.... always. This urge never leaves me. Although I love luxury, I also can't handle the thought of others suffering. You see, I have this desire to go to India. I also want to visit other places as well but this is different. India is calling me. I remember several years ago while I was in my late teens, reading an article from the editor of a magazine who gave up her New York apartment and left unexpectedly to India to help people with Leprosy. Although her article was rather mundane, I still felt that stirred feeling inside, like I needed to do something too. At that time, it wasn't India but now it is. I'm not sure what I would find there. I have friends who are from India that love it here. They say based off my personality I would love it there. You see, I don't want to go for recreational purposes or for business or anything related to fashion/modeling/pageantry. I just want to go for perhaps a spiritual reason and more so to help people. I very much appreciate the beautiful world around me full of possibilities, I do. But I suppose I want to shed light onto others so they too can see a beautiful world around them. I do this a lot with LOLC and the other charities I am involved in. I guess it saddens me sometimes that I can't do more. They say everything has a season. This is true. I can do more with my charitable endeavors once I am finished with a few projects.... so I just have to choose to be present in the moment, not lost in the future or past. But, I still can't help but feel this need to be there.... Away from here. Like I said, there are many places I want to go but those are for business and personal. I even want to go to Jerusalem for religious purposes. But I can't shake India. I just need to find a way to fit this into my schedule.... so I can finally find out what this feeling is really all about. I have no expectations of something grand... in fact I expect very little. I will have to wait and be patient, when the time is right I will fly out.....

Sherrie Gearheart