Life...Real Talk

How can I complain? There are so many people that want to see me fall. It's hard to believe when you are doing something so good, that there are people watching on the sidelines that want to stop your movement, hinder your progress, and reject your goodness. I can hear them now, criticizing that I wrote a blog about haters, about "them". They must feel so important now. I assume, they will always be there. In grade school it was easy to identify them as bullies. Here I am, over 10 years later as a young adult in my twenties and adults are just as bad, even worse. The reason I bring this up is because everyone faces bullies in life. It's not about the struggle, it's about letting go and not caring what they say or think.  God always reveals the truth. Stay strong and stand upright because you and I know the truth. Fortunately for me, I had a hard upbringing so with that comes tough skin, street smarts, and a will that can never be stopped. My ex tried and he gave up. No matter how hard he tried to make me stop my endeavors, I knew in my heart, that God's plan was for me to make a difference, and if he could not accept that, then he could not accept me. I make it sound easy, it wasn't. However, God's will was bigger to me than his. I had a choice and I chose goodness.  I see girls hanging onto "bad, unhealthy" relationships all the time. Let me tell you something, you can NOT change someone. No matter how much you yell, cry, fight, try to work it out, let me tell you..... you can not change ANYONE. But I can unfortunately promise that if you stay in that unhealthy relationship, you will .lose the essence of who you are inside. You will lose your identity and become something you are not. It's like you end up fighting to be who you are....but ultimately you will pick up bad habits along the way. The old adage is true, you become the company you keep. Here are 9 warning signs that you have bad company (ie.. bad relationship, bad friends, etc)
These 9 warning signs are from the following blog: http://www.marcandangel.com/2013/06/09/9-warning-signs-youre-in-bad-company/
1. They only make time for you when it's convenient for them.
2. They hold your past against you.
3.  You feel trapped.
4. They discredit your dreams and abilities.
5. They have lied to you more than once.
6 . Their negativity is rubbing off on you.
7. They are excessively envious of what you have.
8. They motivate you to be judgmental or hateful.
9. They want you to be someone else.
And although this particular blog is not about relationships, I can't help but take a moment and say what's on my heart and mind. The truth is when we do not like something we see in another person that usually means the universe is reflecting that trait back to you so you can fix that trait inside yourself. Or perhaps, the universe is asking you why in the world you keep hanging onto someone that does not FULLY love, appreciate, or support you.

Love..... huh. Love, that word that means so much. Sure, you are probably telling yourself "Well, he or she does love me."  Sure, "they" love you but to what extent? It's hard to ask yourself this question. It's even harder to give yourself a real answer. That's real talk. Come on.... take a moment and ask yourself. What is the answer?  Just because someone loves you does not mean it is a healthy relationship. I am not sure when women lost respect for themselves.... I imagine it starts at a young age. Ladies, it starts with what you wear, what you think, what you say, and my God, who you date and ultimately commit to. Do you think committing yourself to someone that is not good for you means you  have self respect? Please ladies, you are smarter than that.  And men, I am not sure when you accepted that it was ok to mistreat others. Of course this blog is not just about women's hardships, this story goes both ways. Men get mistreated too. Going back to the start of this blog.... I was talking about people that want to stop my charitable endeavors, business successes, etc. The funny thing is..... if they put that same energy into being successful they would actually be somewhere in life. But they don't and instead assume position on the sidelines, wishing, wanting, hating.

I bet they are reading right now, right along side with you. I bet they are angry reading this. I stopped long ago, wishing and hoping they would change. I bet they think I don't know who they are. ha ha. It's not that I don't know who they are, it's that I don't care.  I realize the only person that can cause them to change, is themselves. Instead I pray for them. I pity them. I do not hate anyone..... not even those that still cyber bully me going on 6 years now.  I bet they wouldn't even know what to do with themselves if they stopped..... imagine..... if they just put that effort into saving a life, or perhaps saving their own. Afterall, it isn't this world I am concerned about.... it's when we leave here and meet God that matters. What will you say you did in your lifetime? Were you the bully? Were you ungrateful? Were you disgusting to others? Surely, not you, no not you. Never.

Certain adults think they can bully me because I am young. Just realize, I may be young but I was not born yesterday. If you try to bully me, I too have a backing of people to protect me. I am never alone because I am always surrounded by goodness.   1 Timothy 4:12-14,  "Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation, to teaching. Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you." To all the young entrepreneurs and humanitarians out there..... keep holding it down. You are making the difference in this world. 

I decided within my organization we would only allow "good" people into the mix and on the team. It can seem frightening at times that someone can be a wolf in sheep's clothing. It's ..... how evil seeps in.  However, I see it as it is...... I learned to say no. I learned to let go. I learned to make the hard decisions. I see people for what they are and accept them. I learned to not take people's insecurity and jealousy personally. Their hatred is their problem, not mine. Why on earth would I allow someone to stop me, hinder me, or hurt me? I say goodbye and I mean it. Being a business owner is not always easy..... but someone has to do it. You are sometimes viewed as the good guy or the bad guy and my God, everyone has an opinion.

I said to someone recently, when did people think it's ok to sit around and talk about other models half their age, yes a mom sitting at home tearing another model apart because that model received more recognition than her daughter. I bet she knows who she is...... My God, some people truly need to get a bigger purpose in life..... or in this case take a class in PR. Instead it turned into bashful, hateful words. And the thing is, she is upset that her daughter gets bullied.......what an oxymoron. Real Talk.

Must we revisit what a bully is........ (I bet the bullies are skipping a paragraph right now!)
According to dictionary.com the definition of a bully is, "a blustering, quarrelsome, overbearing person who habitually badgers and intimidates smaller or weaker people."
People that are "weaker" are those that are poorer than someone that is rich. Or those that are struggling with their health, or struggling to get by in life, or someone that is a child compared to an adult, these are just a few examples. I believe this is why God talks so much in the bible about how careful the rich need to be to the poor and how careful we need to be with guarding our heart and who we let into our home. I can hear it now..... the rich bullies reading this are thinking about how they give to the poor..... perhaps they should ponder this, ^"Better a poor man whose walk is blameless than a fool whose lips are perverse." Proverbs 19:1. It isn't just what you do..... it's what you say too.

Here is some more real talk........
I don't need to tell someone I hate them...... why, because I don't hate people. I just remove them from my organization without any feelings of resentment, hatred, etc. You know what I find amusing..... a mom from my most recent show calls me right after I finished a suicide intervention and tells me the breakdown of the show we just completed. She explains to me that there were a small group of models at my fashion show complaining about me...."Sherrie this, Sherrie that." Two ladies in charge told them to stop. I wish they would have informed me during that moment but the show was about to start. I would have walked right down stairs and calmly said, "Thank you for being part of this entire process. At this time I would like for you to leave since for some reason you have no manners and zero respect for me and my organization." I realize some people would not agree with that tactic but as a business owner I keep the integrity of our mission statement close to my heart. It's so hard to believe that "models" would treat you that way after you have given them an opportunity of a life time. You know what I call their attitude "ingratitude". Honest to God, they must think it's everyday that someone under 5'8 gets to walk on a real runway, with a lifestream across the world, and that oh I dont know, everybody gets featured in a magazine. Perhaps it's their parents that put these ideas in their head or someone from the outside world that fed these ideas or lies to them. Or perhaps I hit the nail on the head and they just have no idea....... how ungrateful they really are. I just spent a paragraph on ungrateful people...... I bet they are reading this and find valid reasons for the things they said. I bet they won't even sit back and ponder.......

Why let someone so insignificant take away your peace? God brings peace. Pray, love, and accept goodness into your life. Let go of the bad, let go of the negative, let go...... You will find peace.

Real Talk happens from my heart. I started this blog by saying there are so many people that want to see me fall. However, for everyone one person that hates me..... there are 100 that love me. They can attempt to create an army but no matter how hard they try they can never stop me. And even if they did, God forbid, .... the goodness we have released in the world will be here forever. Imagine that.

I just want to take this time to thank God for every blessing he has given me. Thank you to my family for loving me, taking care of me, guiding me, and protecting me. Thank you mom and Lynn for everything. Amen.